by Anthony Conty (Parkville, MD): “But nothing can be as hard as referring to someone you love in the past tense.” Expressing grief is tough, but processing it through the eyes of a child is a slippery slope. As adults, we can only relate our shared experiences and hope to serve as the best mental health guides possible, even as we suffer on our own.
“All the Blues in the Sky” by Renee Watson thinks through things like a kid and reminds us that they are capable of more than we expect, especially as teachers. We teach children and provide support, such as grief groups, and know that they can do more harm than good in the short term, despite huge benefits in the future.
The author specialized in drama therapy at college and knows how to heal with her words, both for characters and readers alike; for this reason, she allows the main character, Sage, to have imperfect, messy answers. Sage flips out on people and has unrealistic expectations, constantly asking for her best friend back. If you know, you know what is happening.
Middle-grade novels are a tough sell for adults, but I find empathy easy when I have lived some of it before, although no one close to me died so young. Sage has to go through Angel’s stuff and recognize that she is not coming back. Even if you cannot relate to the experience directly, you will feel her acute pain.
I often debate when to stop reading, and here the author’s note helped me, since I thought Sage endured too much pain narratively. Watson explained those choices well and left me with hope. As a father, I have spent a lot of time explaining death to my kids, and the book gave me more ideas on how to do so.
